November 19


How Can an Introvert and an Extrovert Find Common Ground?

If we turn to poets, writers and philosophers, we also don’t get a definite answer. So, for example, Homer in “The Odyssey” said: “God always leads the like to the like”. On the contrary, Schopenhauer wrote: “Only opposites converge, only poles are attracted to each other…”. People are born with a certain temperament and character traits. Even our reactions while hitting a jackpot at a Cookie Casino login website or going to a wedding of our beloved friends differs. And in the first place, it’s due to temperament, which cannot be changed, it’s the basis of our personality.


Children don’t come into this world like a blank sheet of paper, on which parents at their discretion, in their way can draw any person.

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Babies come from mom and dad have a certain temperament: someone calm and patient, someone fussy and crying at the slightest discomfort, one easily calmed down, just taking the hands, the other long will be offended and refuse to smile. We differ from each other in behavior, habits, reaction to stress, susceptibility to external stimuli and ways to replenish energy.

But human behavior depends not only on temperament, but also on character. Character is a way of communicating with the world, which is formed by experience, it’s a manifestation of the will and control over behavior, including temperament. Character is something we can slowly and slowly adjust over the course of a lifetime.

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Education in this case is not omnipotent! It can only influence the level of intelligence and culture, but not the human essence. From this point of view, people are divided into two personality types: extroverts and introverts. And between the two extremes, there is a spectrum of behavior ranging from very introverted to very extroverted.

Who Extroverts Are

An extrovert is an energetic, smiling, active person. He is bright and beautifully dressed, attracting attention to his style, behavior, and manner of speaking. He is surrounded by beautiful things, elegant and eye-catching accessories, around a lot of little things that contribute to comfort. He quickly and easily enters any company, without hesitation, talks about himself, with genuine sincerity and shares his energy with other people.

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Such a person strives for leadership, initiative, but rarely calculates the consequences of his actions. He doesn’t care much about the achievement itself, more interested in the impression that he makes, extremely sensitive to criticism, and often their own self-esteem depends on the opinion of other people.


He is rather frivolous. For the same reason, he often does reckless and inconsiderate things. He speaks out loud a lot, doesn’t always give others the opportunity to express themselves, and pays little attention to what is said. But this always contributes to the reception of energy. Through communication, endless talking and contact, he “feeds off” and feels comfortable. Loneliness is extremely poorly tolerated.

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Who Introverts Are

An introvert is an extremely well-balanced and outwardly calm, thoughtful and judicious person. Often slow, sometimes clumsy, his eyes glide over him, do not cling. Prefers to keep in the shade, little attention to his clothes, most importantly, to be comfortable. He is ascetic in everything, he doesn’t need much and prefers an audience, not the stage. As a rule, he doesn’t show his true emotions. The focus of attention of the introvert – inside himself, on his inner world, personal thoughts, feelings. There he is like a fish in water, he understands and knows everything about himself. This doesn’t mean that he isn’t interested in his environment, he just looks through it.

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These people are great strategists, they understand the situation deeper and farther, they see the essence of things. But for the most part, they choose the role of “gray cardinal”, and in the forefront try to put extroverts. They need to think before they make a decision. They wait for an invitation to a conversation but do not like to show initiative. Observe more than demonstrate. Often believe that they told you something important, although in fact it isn’t.


Both introverts and extroverts have their weaknesses and strengths. It should also be noted that two extroverts or two introverts can be to varying degrees. Moreover, each person can periodically manifest himself or herself as the opposite type, for this it is only necessary to develop skills in connection with some life situations.



In any relationship, personality type has the strongest impact. People look at each other in bewilderment and are constantly surprised that the opposite type reacts in the most unexpected ways. This causes difficulties in communication. For example, excessive caution of introverts often prevents them in the society of extroverts. In some cases, as you know, the active wins. At the same time, self-control and foresight of the same introverts often allows them to be more effective where patience is required, which extroverts don’t not have.


In all situations, a good relationship between opposite types is more likely. And this is understandable. Such people reinforce and balance each other through a wide range of qualities necessary for life. Even on an intuitive level, introverts and extroverts feel much better when they are close, but do not always realize it. That’s why it’s important to learn how to negotiate with each other, given how different you are. Here are a few recommendations that will help in communicating with the opposite type.

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If your interlocutor or partner is introverted:

  • Listen carefully, don’t interrupt, it takes a lot of energy for an introvert to start talking again.
  • Think before you answer, your partner will remember everything you said.
  • Give your partner advance notice of important conversations, an introvert needs time to collect his or her thoughts.
  • Make extensive use of other forms of communication (email, texting).
  • Tell him how much you appreciate what he says, because you understand that it requires a tremendous investment of energy.
  • Behave calmly, taking pleasure in pauses in communication.


If your interlocutor or partner is an extrovert:

  • Speak in short, clear sentences, so it’s easier for an extrovert to hear you.
  • Don’t be afraid to speak loudly and emotionally! And don’t rehearse every time, learn to say what comes into your head.
  • Say that you understand how difficult it is to wait for you to make a decision, and that you don’t finish everything.
  • Don’t forget to tell the extrovert about your attitude toward him, it’s important for him to understand that he is respected, that he is heard.
  • Be generous with signs of attention and compliments.
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Of course, we want our relationships with the people around us, especially our loved ones, to be long, strong and soulful. And for this, it’s necessary to understand and accept the other, taking into account his peculiarities and inclinations. Even in the most difficult situations, in conflicts and misunderstandings, don’t despair! Life is sure to correct everything.

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